Delays, Detours, Derailments, Dinosaur Feet and Other Nasty Bits
Not many things go exactly as planned. No matter how good our model is, there are factors that we can’t control for. Things outside of our realm of influence. Sometimes it’s passive. Sometimes there are forces working actively against us. Experience teaches us to account for this and then to continue to learn, improving and refining the model or process over time.
Even fully knowing this, it’s hard not to get pissed off sometimes when the predictable and preventable things derail a project. Especially when there is a time crunch. There is always a time crunch. I have developed a highly effective system for dealing with things when they’re not going my way. I simply allow my pseudo-Tourette’s to run its course, try to find the humor in the situation and then adjust the plan to the current, altered conditions. Sometimes, the only humor is in the fact that after all these years, I continue to take my expletive game to the next level.
This last week we were planning on processing some turkeys and the preparation didn’t go as planned. By that, I mean that it didn’t happen. At all. It was time to get started and when we plugged the plucker in, it was dead. Again. We have had terrible experiences with Yardbird pluckers. We have purchased two of them from Tractor Supply and they have not performed well at all. For $500 plus dollars, shouldn’t you be able to run more than a few dozen birds through without having problems? By problems, I mean having a shiny, expensive piece of scrap metal instead of a functioning machine. Refocus. Pardon the side rant. Bashing Yardbird’s products isn’t my point. I’m sure there a lot of people out there who have had better luck with them than we have had.
My wife and I realize that the back-to-the-land or homesteading or crazy hippie shit or whatever you want to call it is our thing, not necessarily our kids’ thing. We still use it as a vehicle for education and instruction. Much like the way that Mr Miyagi taught Daniel-san by having him paint the fence, wash the car, etc., many of the lessons may not be recognized or appreciated for years (if ever). Some of the lessons will require maturity and perspective.
The root cause of the turkey processing preparation fail was a failed delegation of the task of getting everything together and testing it the day before prior to it being needed. We stepped away for a while and re-evaluated. Our homesteading rule of thumb is to not plan on accomplishing more than one thing in a given day. If more happens, great, but don’t count on it. Things usually take longer than we think they will. Our task for the day was to get the turkeys processed and into the coolers. We headed back to get set up, planning on hand plucking, which is a bit messier and takes longer, but isn’t too big of a deal. Once we were nearly ready to get started, one of the kids did some Fonzie-shit to the plucker and got it running again. It wasn’t working perfectly, but it was better than nothing.
In the end, we accomplished our goal for the day. Imperfectly de-feathered and gutted birds in the coolers chilling in anticipation of the next step in processing. Later than we intended, but we persevered and got it done. In the end, everyone came through.
Back to the crazy hippie shit for a minute…
What poultry parts do you consider edible? Breast? Thighs? Legs? Wings? Neck? Feet? Liver? Heart? Kidneys? Gizzards? Lungs? Heads? Sure, you can compost the byproducts, or feed them to an animal that would appreciate them more fully than most of us are capable of, but why not live on the edge a little? It takes a little extra effort to prepare some of the nasty bits for consumption. Today, I’m going to show you how to clean the feet and the gizzards.
Why bother?
Turkey feet are repulsive. They look reptilian and they spend their days stomping and scratching through all sorts of filth. They are also an excellent natural source of callagen, chondroitin and other nutrients. You can make actual gelatin from them or use them to lend a more gelatinous quality and increase the flavor complexity in stocks and broths. Some people just eat them, but I’ll stick to the broths for now, thank you very much.
How to clean a turkey foot
What the hell is a gizzard you might ask? Fair question. It’s part of a bird’s digestive system. It’s a bit like a rock tumbler. The combination of the strong muscle contractions and the stones / grit that they contain fulfill the same function as our teeth and stomachs do. They are an excellent source of protein, vitamins and minerals.
How to clean a turkey gizzard
